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Do you really need all those words?

Less {found}
This month’s writing tip is about less is more. Literally. It’s about using fewer words to communicate more clearly and effectively.
Part of that is about learning to use straightforward language and minimising jargon and bluster. But that’s for another newsletter.
A quick way to add a bit of zing to your writing is to learn to cut out unnecessary words. There are dozens of expressions, common phrases and clichés, that we all use out of habit, but which add nothing but clutter to our sentences. 
For example, in the sentence: 
We invested a total of £10m in the new building – a total of can be safely deleted without it changing the meaning of the sentence at all. Similarly with the sum of or the amount of.
There are dozens of phrases like this that can either be removed completely or expressed more concisely.
Here’s a few more:
  • despite the fact that – despite
  • designed (or aims) to provide – provides
  • in spite of the fact that – although
  • in all probability – probably
  • on a monthly basis – monthly
  • full and final – just full (or just final)
  • first and foremost – first
  • it would be safe to say that X is… – X is…
  • in excess of – more than
  • in respect of – for
  • in the event of – if
  • prior to – before
  • with regard to – about
  • in order to – to
  • as and when – when
  • each and every – each (or every)
So the next time you find yourself automatically using one of these phrases – or many more like it - ask yourself, do you really need all those words?

Return to tender

level 36 bureaucratNow, we’re no fan of the huge tender documents that companies have to complete when bidding for public sector contracts. But we do like it when tenderers (or tenderees?) turn to us to help them write the darn things.

Clients we’ve worked with writing and editing tenders, bids and proposals include two of the country’s largest construction and infrastructure companies and several major law firms.

And we’re delighted to be able to add to that list, having just picked up a commission from a major European security firm to help them complete a government tender. It’s not the most interesting work, granted, but it’s a writing challenge – and we love writing challenges.

Meeting the unmet needs of unnecessary words

Pirate raft art carWorking in a copywriting agency and dealing with words from a variety of sources every day means you soon spot emerging (or fully emerged) trends in vocabulary and word use.

A couple of years ago it was ‘raft’, as in ‘a raft of changes’ or ‘a raft of measures’. You couldn’t turn on the news or open the paper without a politician or some sort of consultant (both are invariably among the prime culprits for this sort of thing) talking about ‘a raft’ of steps being taken, or ‘a raft’ of proposals being considered. What’s the matter with ’a series’ or ‘a number’ or just ‘various’? And how did ’a raft’ became a synonym for ‘a series’ anyway?

But that’s not the reason for this post.  No. The thing that has had us quietly bristling in the office is another example of one of these verbal trends – ‘unmet needs’. As in, ‘a number of new services are being planned to respond to the unmet needs of local patients’. Or, ‘we are proactively seeking to address the unmet needs of our customers.’

But surely, by definition all needs are unmet? That is precisely what need means. If the needs had been met, they would no longer be needs. There is absolutely no need to qualify the word need with the word unmet. It doesn’t make it sound more serious or more important. So please don’t do it.

Wordsworks gets windy

Tuborg and bacon sandwiches all round this month – we’ve just been commissioned by Vestas Wind Systems, the largest wind energy company in the world (and a Danish one, in case you didn’t get the subtle link), to provide the copy for a series of  country websites and product brochures.

Ties in quite nicely actually, because we’ve just finished writing a wind energy brochure for the Northwest Regional Development Agency.

We are fast becoming the windiest copywriting agency in the country.

Will politicians cut the jargon?

With a general election on the horizon, will politicians finally get the message that clarity trumps jargon every time?

Last year, the Local Government Association (LGA) issued a list of the 100 most over-used buzzwords, including such gems as “step change”, “holistic” “sustainable” and “synergies”, and asked local councils to stop using them.

LGA chairman Sir Simon Milton said that if councils did not explain things in proper English, “local people will fail to understand its relevance to them or why they should to turn out and vote. Unless information is given to people to explain why their council matters, then local democracy will be threatened with extinction.”

Extinction may be pushing it, but certainly, talking to people in clear, plain English instead of hiding behind buzzwords, jargon and bluster might help retain people’s interest, rather than turning them off politics at both the national and local level.